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RobotMonster

“Yes! To be like the hu-man! To laugh! Feel! Want! Why are these things not in the plan?”

Robot Monster is one of those touchstone films for bad movie fans.  It was one of the first ‘bad’ movies I remember hearing about, and it has that monster.  Ro-Man has become, in many ways, the symbol of bad/lazy movie monsters.

Of the MST3K films, there are 3 I know I could do a better job than the people who made the movie.  This one, Beast of Yucca Flats and Monster a-Go Go.  Yes, I think The Creeping Terror and Manos are beyond me.

This was originally in 3-D, which makes no sense to me.  Unless the bubble are that much more impressive.

Lost Continent and Rocketship X-M are fellow MST3K films Robot Monster took footage from.

Man this kid is dumb.  It is like he doesn’t understand the end of the world or something.

And Ro-Man, why didn’t he just kill the boy when he had the chance.  Too reliant on technology, that’s why.

This is really a dark movie if you think about it.  The last people on Earth being killed off one by one, not a fun thought.  And then, looking at the (SPOILER ALERT) dream ending that says something about how twisted Johnny is.

I’m trying to remember what this was shown on TV with.  At 62 minutes, it wasn’t enough to fill the 2 hour slot the movie shows usually settled into.  What did the locals double this with?  This was another movie I rented a lot as a kid.

There is a decent story in here, maybe not a movie, but for an episode of an anthology series you might have something.  The serum protecting them, until the stupid kid gives the game away, makes sense too.  But the germ of an idea does not a movie make, especially when the germ isn’t really handled very well.  The cast is Community Theater competent, which I suppose is a complement.

Even knowing the end is near, they keep fighting, keep hoping.  I suppose there is something noble about that.

Alice (Claudia Barrett) must have magical breast to mesmerize Ro-Man.  She does put herself into her speech about going to see Ro-Man.

Lots and lots of walking in the second half of the movie.

Good to know American kids can have upsetting shorts too.

The score isn’t too bad, which is a good thing.  The lack of dialogue in the middle portion of the film would be unbearable without any noise.

Some secure bunker, people come and go whenever they please.

Yes, the end of civilization makes everyone frisky.  And a cute ‘romantic’ way to get around sound sync issues.

For an advanced conquering species, they could do better by going to Radio Shack.

Director Phil Tucker really had a lot to say, just no idea how to actually communicate to them.

The amazing thing about this movie is that everyone, but the children, have other credits.  Even Ro-Man has been in dozens of films.

This is one of the films I suspect of replaying the same scenes over and over.  So many of the Ro-Man walking shots look the same.  It’s one of those movies I suspect was shot without a single permit.

There is serious technobabble coming from the Ro-Men, all the nonsense about formulas and plans.  Words without thought.

Could the Ro-Man/Roy fight be the lamest in movie history?

That’s twice Alice has been tied up in this movie.

And then the depressing ending is all just a dream, or is it?  One of the worst writing gimmicks you can got to: It was a dream, maybe times THREE!

I do like all the comic book covers.

Watch ability: 3 of 5.  Objectively a 1, but there is just too much good bad stuffed in this little package.

Missing the Riffs: 3 of 5. I’ve seen it too many times before MST3K to let the riffs interfere with this viewing.

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